Theo Bruinsma -- San Francisco

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The CRANE BIRDS of MONACO (Poem)

The crane is the most common bird in Monaco The air in Monaco is always clean Sometimes a raven can be seen But the crane bird is everywhere Buildings rising here and there All the cranes bear the same name From a family with great fame They rule the skies of Monaco Better to be their friend than their foe In the distance is the palace Where the Prince is pacing with malice Another day another scandal The priest shook his head and lit a candle Who had leaked the dirt? To cause the monarchy so much hurt Who made the man with the crown Look like such a clown? Surrounded by the wrong men Punished by a poison pen Though he still has his crown Many greet him with a hidden frown In Monaco the cranes are everywhere Buildings rising here and there The Crane (bird)

PROFESSOR PIM and the EVIL QUEEN of the NEVERLANDS (Poem)

"Mirror Mirror on the wall Who is the most popular of them all" "Professor Pim" the mirror said The man the Queen wanted dead The Queen hated Professor Pim For he had called her son dumb and dim With only a few days away Professor Pim would have a say The Queen's ministers had warned her The election was around the corner If Professor Pim would become the Prime Minister of the Neverlands He would hold her future in his hands Without a poison apple around A useful idiot had to be found The Queen's men found such a man And quickly drew up a plan Pim was ambushed in a parking lot He was shot, shot, shot Professor Pim was no more And the Queen found a new man to adore She named her favorite horse after him The man who had murdered Pim No politician thereafter made fun of the crown Because they all wanted to stick around And that's why they call it the Neverlands Because the people will never know their plans

PROMISED YOU AMERICA

In the previous century, after the Second World War, many Europeans sought to immigrate to the United States. It was the promised land, a beautiful and safe country. These immigrants had to work to survive, back then there were no financial support programs for immigrants. My father was one such immigrant after leaving Holland after the Second World War. He worked many odd jobs until he became his own salesperson, first selling Dutch chocolate from his VW van to supermarkets, and thereafter he became a successful fine arts dealer, importing Dutch paintings to California art galleries. One of my first jobs after arriving in America in 1983 was that of a busboy at the Bankers Club. Nowadays they call that job an "assistant waiter" but back then that job was called busboy and "Human Resources" was called the "Personnel Office." The restaurant was on top of the 52nd floor of the Bank of America building. At the time, this was the highest floor in San Fran...

COMING TO AMERICA

As a teenager growing-up in Holland, I used to watch numerous American TV shows. The one that I really liked was Miami Vice starring Don Johnson. At this time in Holland there were only two television channels, and they didn’t commence until 3pm in the afternoon and ended slightly passed 11pm. Another one I really liked was Magnum, P.I. starring Tom Selleck. And though Magnum, P.I. was featured only once a week, it provided me with enough inspiration to enter the world of palm trees, white beaches, beautiful women and a red Ferrari. But if not a red Ferrari, I would have gladly settled for the convertible Rolls-Royce Corniche as occasionally featured in my other favorite TV show, Hart to Hart , starring Robert Wagner and Stefanie Powers. For me, Don Johnson, Tom Selleck, and Robert Wagner as portrayed on television were the ideal men living in the ideal world. So in 1983, after graduating from high school in Holland, I stepped aboard a KLM Boeing 747 to the USA. It was ...

MONIQUE DROVE A CITROËN SM

SAN FRANCISCO 1983-85: One of my favorite places to go was a place called Dancers located on Harrison and Second Street. Dancers was a large, dark place with many colored lights flashing around as an industrial-beat of music kept breeding an inescapable aura of sexuality, as girls were even dancing on top of the bar. Earlier I had awkwardly asked several of them to dance with me, but I was rejected every time. And just as I was about to become discouraged, I saw an attractive female standing near the dance floor, leaning against a pillar with her arms folded. She appeared relaxed, with her long, curly hair that fell over her bare shoulders. Her eyes were large and brown under thick, manicured eyebrows. But after approaching her, she too would decline my dance request. But refusing to be dismissed, I had asked her the trite follow-up question: "Do you come here often?" And it worked, a conversation ensued. And it turned-out we had something in common: she too had worked at the...

WHEN SINATRA SINGS

Frank Sinatra and Grace Kelly in High Society (1956) DALLAS, TEXAS: In October of 1986, there was a huge event at the Hilton Anatole Hotel (which was then called the Loews Anatole). It was the Princess Grace Foundation. Several days prior to this event, all personnel who were scheduled to be working it underwent background checks. Though we waiters weren’t told of any specifics, there noticed a lot of suits walking around and we suspected they were federal agents. In the afternoon, as we were setting up the banquet tables with wine glasses and silverware, numerous celebrities were rehearsing their presentations for the event later that evening. As I was wiping and placing the dinner knives around the table, Diane Warwick was sound-checking the microphone from different locations in the back of the Pavilion room. As a teenager in Holland I often played her music to the extent that my mother once asked me if I was in love. We waiters were busy for hours...

THE STARCK CLUB -- BEING THERE

Inside The Starck Club DALLAS, TEXAS -- 1985-89: My favorite place that I would frequently visit in Dallas was the Starck Club. It was located in the old part of town, where the once life-sustaining warehouses were abandoned and crumbling, right past the forgotten railroad tracks of the forgotten Industrial Revolution. But this one particular warehouse was adopted and remodeled by the French architect and designer, Philippe Starck. Getting into the Starck Club wasn’t easy. There was always a long line and the club’s doormen were very selective about who they allowed to enter. Since I was in my early twenties with bleached blond hair, I was hip enough to pass. I also wore black parachute pants while standing in white leather shoes -- all very Duran Duran like. The first time I entered the Starck Club I was in a state of shock and awe. It wasn’t just the unique design of the club, but the energy, the music, and the women. I had never been to a place whe...

Meeting Wolfgang Puck and Robert Duvall

Crescent Court Hotel, Dallas, Texas DALLAS, TEXAS -- 1985-89: Luckily, a new hotel had opened-up in Dallas, and I was able to work some banquet shifts there. It was a 5 star hotel called The Crescent Court Hotel. Its banquet manager, Jorge, had previously worked at the Anatole Hotel as an assistant banquet manager with Charles Lorenzi. The banquet facility at The Crescent Court Hotel was minuscule in comparison to the Anatole Hotel, but they paid much better, and I liked working there. Jorge was originally from Bolivia, was medium built and had wavy black hair, which wasn’t bad for a man in his forties. He also had a big black mustache and a very large oval head that seemed out of proportion to the rest of his body. Before the banquet commenced, Jorge was always nervous and overly serious. But after finally serving the dessert and coffee, he became relaxed and charming. And as a banquet waiter, the money was always very good and so wa...

Is The Dutch Monarchy Constitutional?

King Willem-Alexander and his mother Princess Beatrix smiling at the people who pay for their palaces According to Article 1 of the Dutch Constitution, every individual in the Netherlands should be treated equally under the law. However, there is one family who is above the law: the superior royal Dutch family. This is a huge contradiction in Dutch society and culture. The Dutch legislature should either abolish Article 1 or the monarchy and revert back to a republic, which the Netherlands originally was. Not only are the Dutch royals above the law, they run over the rights of the Dutch people by taking their money. And then the King lectures the Dutch people about "equality" and "diversity" as the Dutch politicians, elected by the Dutch people, sit there silently while he does. In the Netherlands they call that "democracy." Somewhere along the line the Dutch went from total football to total monarchy. King Willem-Alexander is one of the richest ...